Veggie and the Ouija Board
by PerfectCell17
Summary: Basically, Vegeta's first time using a Ouija Board.


It was a typical day at Capsule Corp, meaning of course, that Vegeta was training.

The Saiyan Prince adjusted the gravity to his usual 450G and began his warm up.

Suddenly the power in the gravity room went out, bringing the gravity back to normal.

"What the hell?!" Vegeta demanded, leaving the room.

Bulma stood in the hallway where her lover was sure to pass through, with her arms folded.

Sure enough, Vegeta came down the hall and didn't look too happy.

"Woman, what the hell did you do to the electricity in my gravity chamber?!"

"Don't 'woman' me, Vegeta! You told me you would clean out the attic last week, now get your ass up there and do it!"

"I shouldn't have to clean it, it's nothing of mine!"

"Well, if you don't clean it you're going to be living in it!"

Vegeta let out a low growl of defeat. "Fine woman!"

With that the Saiyan stomped off, towards the hallway that lead to the attic.

"Hmph, this should be easy, then I can back to my training." Vegeta said aloud, climbing up the narrow passage that lead to the attic.

"Dammit, I'm suppose to clean _this_?!" the prince demanded, looking at the endless boxes that filled the room.

Deciding to get rid of the boxes his favourite way, Vegeta formed a small ball of ki in his palm and shot it.

POOF 

The smoke cleared and the attic was empty, well except for one box.

"A Ouija Board, what the hell is that?!"

Not knowing what it was, Vegeta opened the box and a board fell out.

"What the hell? A board game?!"

The Ouji picked up the board to examine it and noticed that it was not an ordinary board game.

Still not sure what the hell it was, Vegeta took the rest of the contents out of the box, the pointer and the instructions.

"A Summoning board?"

_By using this board, along with the special pointer, communicating with long since dead spirits is made possible._

"How foolish!"

The Saiyan threw the contents on the ground, and turned to walk back downstairs.

Just as Vegeta reached the ladder, he turned around and stared at the board.

He wasn't sure, but something seemed to be attracting him to the game.

"Maybe I could try it, just once..."

Hesitently, the Ouji approached the resting place of the board and sat down in front of it.

"Okay, what do I do first?"

_To begin, simply place two fingers on the pointer with minimum pressure._

Vegeta complied with the instructions and rested his index and middle fingers lightly on the pointer.

_Once the fingers are on, relax your mind and body, and become one with the board._

"How the hell do you become one with a board?! I think I'll skip that..."

Vegeta took in a few deep breaths to relax himself, before continuing on.

_Now that your body and mind are relaxed, focus on the pointer, and within minutes it should begin to move._

"I have to wait for this hunk of plastic to move?! It better work!"

Wanting to increase his relaxation, the Saiyan closed his eyes and focused on the object below his fingertips.

A couple minutes, but what seemed like eternity to the impatient Saiyan passed, with no reaction, irritating him.

Just as he was about to say fuck it, the little black object began to move.

"What do you know, it actually works..."

Vegeta smirked, as it gradually began to move at a quicker pace, circling the board.

Once again, it was time to read the next instruction.

_After about 6-8 minutes have passed, the pointer should have begun moving, although at a turtleish pace. Wait to ask anything until it's speeds up._

"I think it's been long enough, it's going pretty fast... But what do I say to the damn thing?! I'm not use to talking to boards, that's something Kakarot would do!"

_Remeber, not all questions are liked by the spirits. Which ones depend on who you're connected to, but here are a couple of suggestion questions:_

_-What is your name?_

Vegeta decided to stop there before reading any others, and ask that question.

"Who are you, spirit?"

The pointer once again moved, but this time stopping at letters.

W-H-O W-A-N-T-S T-O K-N-O-W

The Saiyan's smirk grew at the fact that he got a response.

"I am Prince Vegeta!"

P-R-I-N-C-E O-F W-H-A-T

"The entire Saiyan race."

D-O-N-T M-A-K-E M-E L-A-U-G-H

Vegeta blinked at the answer, did the board just give him an attitude?!

"Hmph, you still never told me who the hell you were!"

I A-M S-A-R-A-H

"Figures, a woman is only capable of that kind of attitude..."

W-A-T-C-H I-T

"Can ghost women PMS?"

Y-O-U S-H-O-U-L-D K-N-O-W Y-O-U-V-E D-I-E-D

Once again, the prince was taken back, he didn't know spirits could pack so much spunk.

Wait a minute, how did Sarah know that Vegeta had died?

"How did you know that I died?!"

I K-N-O-W A-L-L R-E-M-E-M-B-E-R T-H-A-T

Vegeta rolled his eyes at the board.

"Hmph, am I suppose to be scared?"

I-F Y-O-U W-E-R-E S-M-A-R-T

"I'm smart enough not to be scared to a baka board that I have control over!"

D-O Y-O-U

"What the hell is that suppose to mean?! Of course I have control, MY fingers are the one's moving the damn pointer!"

P-O-O-R M-O-N-K-E-Y

A low growl came from Vegeta's throat.

"What the fuck is that suppose to mean?!"

L-E-T M-E S-H-O-W Y-O-U

With that, the pointer, still attached to the ouji's finger flew up at him, hitting him in the forehead.

The pointer fell back down, and landed it's origional position on the board.

"What the hell?! I didn't do that!"

O-F C-O-U-R-S-E Y-O-U D-I-D-N-T I D-I-D

"Hmph, I refuse to believe some baka spirit has any sense of control over me!"

D-O Y-O-U W-A-N-T M-E T-O P-R-O-V-E I-T A-G-A-I-N

Before the now very confused Saiyan could answer, the event that took place seconds ago repeated itself.

Deciding to give up on this damn board, and get away from the seemingly crazed Sarah, Vegeta tried to take his fingers off the pointer, only to find that they wouldn't budge.

"What is going on?!"

I-T-S O-V-E-R W-H-E-N I S-A-Y I-T-S O-V-E-R

"This is ridiculous! It's just a board game, something for brats!"

T-H-A-T E-X-P-L-A-I-N-S W-H-Y Y-O-U-R-E U-S-I-N-G I-T

"Enough! I don't know what the fuck's going on, but I'm ending it _right_ _now!"_

F-O-R A P-R-I-N-C-E Y-O-U-R-E N-O-T V-E-R-Y S-M-A-R-T

The prince growled, and once again tried to free himself from the board, but to no avail.

An idea struck the Saiyan, if the instructions could tell you how to begin converstaions, then they must say how to end them!

Skimming through to the bottom of the page, Vegeta found the section he was looking for, but was not happy with what it read.

_The conversation will come to an end when both you and the spirit have a mutual Good-bye._

"So much for this ending any time soon..."

D-O-N-T W-O-R-R-Y I-T W-I-L-L E-N-D

A small pause, between both Vegeta and Sarah.

T-H-A-T I-S W-H-E-N I-M D-O-N-E W-I-T-H Y-O-U

"What do you mean 'when you're done with me'?!"

I W-A-N-T T-O H-A-V-E A-L-I-T-T-L-E F-U-N F-I-R-S-T

The Saiyan was beginning to feel alittle uneasy by this point.

"What do you mean by that?"

Y-O-U-L-L S-E-E

Okay, maybe alittle uneasy was an understatement, Vegeta was feeling _very_ uneasy.

Once again, the instructions were consulted, afterall, there had to be something about deranged, disgruntled spirit women, right?

Bingo, the Ouji found just what he was looking for, a paragraph titled 'Disgruntled Spirits'.

"Okay, let's see what it says..."

_Unlike the typical spirit, some ghosts tend to be more mischevious, and may begin to cause you trouble..._

"No shit!"

_But, if you run into such a problem, there are ways to deal with it:_

_-Ask the spirit why it is so agressive._

_-Help the spirit cross over, to the other side._

Stopping there, Vegeta opted to try the first method.

"Woman spirit, what the hell is wrong with you?! Why the hell are you being so bitchy?!"

Well, needless to say, the Saiyan asking the way he did, didn't help his situation.

I-M D-E-A-L-I-N-G W-I-T-H Y-O-U W-H-A-T D-O Y-O-U E-X-P-E-C-T

"Hmph, I'm not being 'bitchy', and I'm stuck dealing with you!"

T-H-A-T-S A M-A-T-T-E-R O-F O-P-I-N-I-O-N

"Watch it."

So, option one wasn't working for the prince, so onto choice two, which didn't look as easy...

"How in the hell do you get a bitchy spirit to cross over?!" Vegeta mentally demanded, before giving it a random try.

"Uh, spirit-woman, shouldn't you be in the Other World? More specifically, hell..."

W-H-E-N I A-M R-E-A-D-Y

"What aren't you? Not done annoying the hell out of me?!"

E-X-A-C-T-L-Y

The Saiyan warrior groaned, of all the battles he had fought in, the was definately the most irritating.

Normally, Vegeta could always attack, kick ass, and be done with his usual problems, but this wasn't usual...

How could he attack something he couldn't see or sense, something that wasn't even alive?!

Suddenly, the Prince got an idea, and powered up to Super Sayian status, the pointer shaking beneath his hand.

Vegeta smirked, and began gathering energy in the palms of his hands. Maybe blasting the damn pointer would get rid of this 'Sarah'!

When the two small ki blasts were formed, they were fired into the board, sending him flying back across the attic, and freeing him from the game.

A layer of smoke from the blasts fogged the room, making it to see, but Vegeta figured it was over. Afterall, who could survive an attack from _him_?

"You've got to be kidding me...!"

Apparently the board could survive, and was currently in the same place it had been, totally unharmed.

The Ouji picked himself up off the floor, and turned to go back downstairs.

"Why do I care if it's still up here? I won't be back here anytime soon."

Feeling something from behind him, Vegeta turned around, just in time to dodge an object that had come flying at him.

The object, which was now very familiar to the Saiyan landed on top the the door leading back to the rest of CC.

"How in the hell can this thing move if I'm not touching it anymore?!"

Since the pointer was now seperated from the board, no answer was given, which creeped Vegeta out. Now he wouldn't even know what Sarah was up to!

Feeling something again, the Prince ducked just in time to dodge the game board itself, followed by the box.

Noticing that the only thing left that wasn't trying to attack him was the instructions, the warrior leapt at them, and held on to them tightly.

Still having to dodge game pieces, Vegeta searched for some kind of help in the instructions, and finally came across the last paragraph called 'Possessions'.

"Could this help? It better, it's the only damn part left!"

_Sometimes if the player leaves without the mutual Good-bye, it is said that the spirit may possess objects, or even the player him/herself._

"You mean I might be stuck with her?! Not if I can help it!"

Ducking from the new round of game parts, the Saiyan powered up even higher, and prepared for a Final Flash.

"Let's see you survive this!" Vegeta taunted at inanimate objects, as the ki crackled around him. "Final Flash!"

The room became engulfed in light as the attack hit it's destination, blinding the Prince.

When his eyesight was back, Vegeta's mouth went agape when he saw the hole he had just created in the floor.

"Great, just what I need, to hear the woman screeching at me next..."

Vegeta didn't mind having to deal with Bulma right now though, if he could take on Sarah, he could take on any woman.

Heading back towards the door, the Ouji froze in his place when he saw the Ouija Board sitting neatly in the corner, the pointer on top of it, moving.

Wanting to know what the spirit was now saying, he approached the game.

N-O-T T-H-A-T E-A-S-Y

Vegeta felt sick, there was just no way...

Calmly, the Saiyan walked to the door, and climbed downstairs, his lover glaring daggers at him.

"Honestly, Vegeta, can you ever _not_ blow something up?!"

The male just walked by her, not saying anything.

"What, aren't you even going to defend yourself?!"

"The board..."

"Huh? What are you talking about? What board?"

"The board..."

"I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but you're going to have to clean up the mess you made, and fix the damage! Both in the attic and down here!"

Vegeta still didn't say anything, and continued walking away, and out to his gravity chamber.

"The board..."

Owari!

A/N: Don't ask, this was a fic I wrote for my best friend, and decided to post it with my other weird Veggie one shots! I hope you guys liked it, even though I put poor Vegeta through that... :)

Please review, tell me what you thought!


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